random mail.

today starbucks sent me something lovely in the mail.. 

yes.. thats right
i got a gold card.. and look at the list of all the little bonuses that come with having a gold card. 
ahh starbucks.. my addiction to their coffee has even been realized by starbucks themselves!
have a happy friday!

words on writing

how often do bloggers get writers block? i mean, this blog you read here is everywhere, its unorganized and inconsistent. sometimes i write about my thoughts or something on my mind, sometimes its a written and picture diary of what i did on a single day, sometimes i post music videos for my favourite songs. im random and so is this blog but i find my mind races when when im stressed or worried. when i have other things in my life i should give priority to.. this is when i write, this is when my thoughts make their way to paper and this blog. i find i write most posts during exam time or in times of high stress. im so relaxed right now.. christmas is over, im in between semesters in school and my weekly work schedules are doable.. i have time to sit and read books and some of the blogs im everyday inspired by. i have time to watch movies with my sisters and hang out with my friends and i have time to write. why does everyone of these things i have time to do get done except for write, when to be completely honest, it would be hard to take any one of those particular activities off that list. maybe im distracted or exhausted, im unsure. maybe its just writers block. whatever it is, it is bugging me. but for now, i get to catch up on reading reading the words of others. 
i hope everyone had an amazing christmas!  

toronto is all christmasy

last wednesday it was my dads birthday. usually each december 21st, for my dads birthday, my family and i go skiing. normally december 21st comes along with snow.. unfortunately this year it didn't... it was 4 degrees celsius and raining! yes raining! hey.. i live in canada.. its not supposed to rain in december. we are use to white decembers with temperatures far below 0. no snow concluded no skiing. instead, my dad decided we would go to toronto for the day. he asked me some of my favourite places in toronto and we went to all of them. we went to the distillery district.. walked to st lawrence market, then went to the eatons centre and walked around to see the beautiful windows decorated for christmas time (of course i have other places in toronto i love, but we only had a day!)

 yes. there was no one there!

it was rainy and a wednesday

 i think it would be much more attractive if there was snow

 beautiful windows

merry christmas eve!

secret santa

secret santas are always fun.. its always interesting to see what others get you when a) they are forced to spend less than $25 and b) they are forced to pick a name and its possible they may not know you as well. this year  i did a secret santa gift exchange with some of the girls from my program (there were 6 of us including me). we have only known each other since september, but apparently im easy to buy a present for.. katrina picked out the perfect gift for me...

i guess everyone knows of my addiction to coffee

and starbucks

* ps: inside the card.. was a chunk of santas beard! it was amazing! haha*

christmas wish list

for the past month and a half my parents have been asking me to make a christmas list. this task is harder than i imagined.. until all about 5 minutes ago i had one items written on my list. the only item on my list to my parents was a car charger for my blackberry (i dont even own a car, but my phone has horrible battery life and i think its a good idea to have when driving). for the past two years i had asked for a nikon d 3000. i got one for my birthday this year, placing a strike through that item on this years planned christmas list. i really dont need anything! i live at home for free, dont need kitchen appliances, food, bill payments. i cant think of cds or movies i want, not clothes or electronics. i can't even think of books i want, those ideas come to me as im walking through aisles of books, or recommendations from friends/family. 
so then 10 minutes ago i was forced to think long and hard about something small, like a stocking stuffer, i want from my sisters (we decided we should only spend about $20 on each this year). so okay, maybe i want a pair of mitts, and a picture/poster like thing for the wall in my room. maybe a hardcover notebook to carry around and write in, or bookends? i've wanted some for a while now. im unsure if any of these cost less than $20 but at least it gives them some ideas.. continuing my 'what do i want for christmas' search.. i was online window shopping on etsy and i found something perfect! ...

beautiful!

leather straps, snap button closure!

i love it and want it

*link it up here *

the weight of water

this morning, out of my usual routine of getting driven to school by my dad - he goes that way anyways to get to work- i took a bus to school. i actually don't mind taking public transportation, unless its at night. i used to hate it, i used to be bothered by the people on the bus and jump to ultimate judgement of why these people didn't have cars when they were older than my parents. i was spoiled and narrow minded. so on the bus as usual, i sit right near the bus doors - my reasoning for this is not simply to have easy access to the doors, but rather to be at optimal location for hearing conversations - creepy? maybe a little. i think people are interesting and normally have interesting stories to tell.. and plus, if they don't want anyone to hear maybe they should have conversations at locations other than on city buses. the bus makes a few stops, people get on, people get off and then the bus stops in front of a man and a women. the two of them were wearing clothes more appropriate for july than december and jeans were torn and filthy. as the man stands at the front of the bus scrounging through his money to find the bus fair for both of them, the women rolls a large round dirty object through to the centre of the bus and sits adjacent to me. when the man comes and sits beside her she says "this is going to be beautiful". he smiled and responded "i know". she described how she was going to clean it and paint it copper and line the mirror (i had no idea it was a mirror until this point) with a pattern of his choice. she said the frame had a crack, but the mirror was fine, it was perfect. she said she was going to find a way to hang it somewhere. 
now that, right there, is my inspiration. 

people who have the creativity, risk and love which enables them to find beauty in the most unconventionally beautiful things

its not as easy to do as you think, so see beauty in the smallest things is not something you can just train yourself to do. ive tried. 

i wish we could open our eyes, to see in all directions at the same time

almost each day for the past few week ive received a text:"ask me something".  This has slowly become one of my favourite three word texts. it requires me to compile thoughts together to form a question i want to know the answer to. taken verbatim the text requires me to ask any simple superficial question i want to know about him such as; what is your favourite movie? favourite dessert? best christmas present?. sometimes my questions do take this approach. this text warrants caution though and this caution is solely based on the fact that this individual is rather intelligent and analytical almost to the point of insanity. asking him such a superficial question would bore him and what is the fun in that right? 
last night my question was "what inspires you?". his response: natural phenomena - beauty in the world that occurs so naturally. like the patterns in a snowflake. 

he answered it so simply, so perfectly.

so, what inspires you? 

think about it..

i want to know!

bask in your uniqueness

hey you. im me and i like you as you. we are different people and we think entirely different, thats part of the appeal. i like intelligence and thought, i want your own opinions, not my recited back to me. dont find quotes you think i'll like, find quotes you like and tell me why you like them. don't read books because i love books, tell me what you love instead of books. you dont need to have the "in" on my favourite tv shows or like my favourite seasons, i find comfort in knowing you have your own passions, joys and guilty pleasures. feel free to judge my opinions, dislike them, disagree with them.. just dont change yours to conform with them.

chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream.. 

my obsession.. 

maybe

awkward and awesome

its another awkward and awesome thursday and for some reason im super excited about it today. probably because awkwards are more often my favourite and ive got some memorable ones this week


awkward
- walking into turtle jacks (the restaurant) for my work staff christmas party with my friend, looking around for the table they are at. My friend starts walking over to a table and im still looking around everywhere and im like oh! do you see them? i was going to ask the wait staff. and they were right there. right in front of the door! all staring and waving at us
- a 15 yr old boy coming into work and trying to sell me his 1995 samsung flip phone with no battery. he told me its his last one and its a good deal. i looked at him and couldn't help but laugh. i had to turn away and ask my manager to deal with it.
- some girls jacket getting caught on my chair in study area at school.. causing her to kick my coffee across the room (there were no tables, it was on the floor near my chair) and practically fall on my friends chair.. my only thought was "whoa, what just happened..my coffee! i needed that"
- not having my schedule memorized in even the last week of classes (definitely missed a class by accident because i thought it was at 3, not 2)
- trying to get out of the silent area study room at school.. the doors are soo heavy i can only open it enough to barely get my body through (i think people think im incompetent.. im just weak)
- my friend actually telling me he laughs at how awkward i am lol
- trying to get a picture of guinness and i with the christmas tree..

awesome
- waking up to snow
- weather perfect for wearing my new boots and down jacket
- christmas tree is decorated and stockings are hung
- love (like) or something like it.
- guinness's fascination with snow (he eats a pathway for himself before he walks in it)
- over 80% on all my projects this year
- ski season is upon us!

oh christmas tree..

a pine tree, never changing. no transformations in hue as the seasons change and not a thought in minds for 11 months of a 12 month annum. the 12th month brings appreciation and a recognized purpose of a simple pine tree. each year my family ventures out to select the perfect christmas tree; a tree to bring home and decorate, to guard our presents. its comforting to have it here, it creates a warmth not present in the absence of the tree, and it brings excitement and wills kindness and sharing. 
we personalize our christmas trees. my family and i place an angel at the top, wrap the tree in gold ribbon and each year place less and less homemade childhood ornaments on its branches (even though my parents most likely have saved them). some ornaments were purchased and others were gifts, still others were passed down. some place a cross or a star on top, some have no ribbon, some load the branches with candy canes and last years favourite christmas cards. others place pictures in hanging ornaments from the tree, some place coloured lights and some place white lights. they are personalized to each family, each house hold. 
this tree will be a huge part of my christmas season..

tis the season.

<3 

im glad ive learned this.. your turn

did you know that people often make judgements about you within 10 minutes of meeting you, sometimes its even three minutes. this is important! first impressions make decisions. who are you friends with, who will you hire, who do you want to work with, who do you want to babysit your kids? first impressions help make these decisions. but first impressions can be the least thought of if you have the opportunity to show a different impression next time. sometimes people wont let you, after a bad first impression they go to ultimate avoidance and dont give you the opportunity. i dont think ive ever really thought too much about first impressions until this year, where i have suddenly developed this determination to change a groups impression of someone else.

this year im in a new program at school and i swear it is the most diverse group of people ever. it is also the most cliquey group of individuals i know.. basically everyone chose their group within 1 day.. maybe 2 days of classes and sit with that group in all our classes. im one of them, i'll admit (and i love the group i sit with).  we are however, placed into work groups in each of our classes and these groups are normally not chosen, they are assigned in some way. as much as it sucks to get a bad group, i think its a great way to un-clique (or un-click.. if you are american). so anyways.. there is this guy (i'll call him tim) who i have gotten to know fairly well and of course hes that guy who so bluntly does not care. my friends in class think hes dumb, he never shows up to class, he seems arrogant and thoughtless, lazy and snobbish. hes that guy that has to express his opinion in every class he actually does show up to and has the laissez-faire attitude that everyone hates! in social situations he is a complete jerk! but.. when you are forced to work in a group with him and actually have a small group or one-on-one conversation with him.. anything but lazy, thoughtless and arrogant present itself. hes creative, smart and funny. hes also an amazing writer, which i like. hes interesting and thoughtful. it just sucks that he acts so careless, developing bad judgments by everyone else. why tim, why!? when i meet a person like this.. i want others to see him this way too! but the only thing i can say to my friends is that they have to give him a chance.. i cant change their opinions even though i want too so badly. and i cant change him.. i cant tell him to be nice to everyone, attend class and just drop his opposing opinions once in a while!

i can't change anyone and i know this, but im creating an awareness.. in order to truly judge someone you need to give them more then one chance. giving them one chance to impress, i can guarantee, will result in you missing out on some of the most amazing people. some people surface act in social or stressful situations but its not who they are 96% of the time. try to talk to people one-on-one if they will let you.. judge them fairly on who they are, not how they appeared the first time you met him. you are doing your self a favour this way.  

chocolate calendar time

its december 1st today! you know what that means..

i get to eat the first chocolate of this years countdown to christmas calendar. yes im 24 and my mom still buys me a chocolate calendar every year.. its one of the many traditions i love. 
its also time for christmas list making, christmas shopping, christmas baking, ugly sweater parties and all the other traditions; christmas tree cutting pour example. (yes pour.. its my attempt at french)
okay, so i'll cross off christmas list making this year. i got my nikon D3000 for my birthday this year which is way more than my parents spend on birthdays. no christmas presents for me this year.. but i have a puppy now! so i'll make a list for him. too be honest, i dont think i could even make a list for myself if i needed to. i can't think of anything i need/want. maybe a chapters gift certificate.. :)
and sadly, i even have to miss out on christmas tree cutting this year. i have to work this weekend and thats when my parents have decided to go :(.. but im totes in for the christmas baking and the ugly sweater parties im planning on attending! 
oh and despite what i said earlier.. if there is anything i want for christmas it may or may not be found in this little treasure right here:

and new glasses. i would like some new glasses.. as much as i love mine, i think my eyes have gotten worse.. thats what getting older does to you!

no im not getting greedy.. im just saying


*loop scarf american eagle outfitters, 40% off *